The Wii U web browser last used to list the Wii U on eBay

MINNEAPOLIS— A local gamer unearthed his long-dormant Nintendo Wii U and used his web browser one last time to list it on eBay, sources have confirmed.

“Wow, that’s ironic,” said Troy McNeil, as he used his Wii U gamepad to take a picture of the Wii U system. “Not so much that I use it to post it on eBay with its own web browser, but I guess I don’t use it at all. “Ironic” might not be the right word. It’s uh, it’s “weird” to use it. Maybe ‘boring’ is the word. Oh fuck, this makes me enter my password on this horrible tablet controller. I can’t talk and do this shit at the same time, okay?”

Housemates who thought they’d seen the last of the Wii U were shocked to hear about it once again.

“Wow, fuck that thing,” said Simon Downs, a former roommate of McNeil’s. “For about six months he tried to convince us that it was a fun system with good hardware. What a tough six months, man. It’s kind of weird that he’s using it to sell himself, huh? It’s like the time he drove his car across town to the guy who was buying it for him.

“He had to go home in the snow,” he added with a laugh.

At press time, the console had successfully gone on sale, in a message that simply read: “For Sale, Wii U, Barely Played”.

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